What makes a difference in an hour.

Motivation. The people watching you. People who know you and have a defined opinion of you. Or don't. 

What am I talking about?

Singing in 2 different services at church last week. 

Getting up and practicing with the church accompanist at 7:45am is never my favorite thing. 

I can say with confidence that no singer likes getting up that early and having to sing at all. 

But I've always been okay with doing it at church. There I feel safe. There people know me and my story and are on my side. 

With a few exceptions. Then I say f.u. And sing my ass off. 

It does matter to me who is in the audience. I want to impress certain people, others make me feel good and I'm happy they're there. Then also I want to make a good impression for those who are new. 

Those who I know are not my biggest fan push me the most, though. It's like I have to prove that whatever they think they don't like about me, they're wrong. It's like I'm trying to say, "you know how fabulous I am and you're sorry about whatever went down between us. And now you can't do anything about it. Have a nice life." 

Is that so wrong? Shouldn't my biggest fans be the ones who push me to be my best? I say no. Those people will love and support me no matter how I sing. Those who don't will only critique me more harshly. So I just can't give them anything to bitch about. 

(I'm sorry for my language. This is just a touchy subject, if you hadn't noticed.)

So what motivates you?

Until next time,

sopranodivaEm